It’s been over a year now since my husband and I separated, and I still haven’t “announced it” on social media like facebook or anything until today right here. It was just simply too sad I would sit and cry at the keyboard and dread dealing with the response from everyone we knew. My good friends and family know, of course. I’ve been meaning to write this blog for a very long time because we hadn’t even had Karma a year when it happened, and at the time I had so many questions about what other people had done in similar situations. I feel quite steadfast that my little pup is MY baby, my best friend. My soul mate. I had found her, fallen in love with her, I felt that it was me that had “saved” her. However her fur dad had also really grown to love her and couldn’t imagine life without her and of course she is crazy about him. I respected that and wanted to do what was best for her too.
Our two cats were easier… as much as I love them and it broke my heart, it was decided that as I was moving out, they would stay with their fur dad in their home. They are so much more sensitive to moves, and we had already dragged them across the globe from America to Australia… I didn’t want them to have any negative health effects due to another relocation and their fur dad loves them and cares for them so much.
I have been incredibly lucky to rent a house that has a fantastic yard for Karma and although she was very anxious and unhappy the first month or so when she came to visit, now she shows just the same excitement towards my place as she does towards her original “forever home”. That first month was tough… I kept second guessing myself. She is already a special needs girl and she was very unhappy in a new and strange place. She cried all night and had lots of potty accidents. But yes, she has adapted and now she loves it! I think she also loves that both her parents put even more effort into ensuring she’s happy and spoiled, which means lots of trips to the beach and a ridiculous amount of new toys!
SO – after a few discussions we settled on a rather easy co-custody agreement. I take Karma four days a week (Tue – Saturday morning) and he has her three days (Saturday thru Tue morning). If either of us wants to take a holiday, it’s also great to know that with her special needs / incontinence there is someone out there that knows exactly how to care for her and love her just right, so we just give each other plenty of heads up and also request any extra days or changes. Just like someone would with a human child 🙂
I’m not sure if this arrangement will stay the same, but for the past eight months or so it has been working rather well.
This has definitely been an extremely challenging time and of course my blog writing has not been a priority, but I can tell you that our special little Karma is doing better than ever despite a short adjustment period. I can also tell you that sometimes in my darkest hours, the only thing that got me through was this amazing little ball of energy, happiness and love that we named Karma. If anyone else has had a similar experience of separation / divorce and determining what to do with your beloved furbaby I’d love to hear about it and how you handled it in the comments.
Thanks to all of you who love Karma and continue to want to hear about her – it means a lot!